Tuesday, May 31, 2011

how it feels to be in a flap

Was still rainging when we got home. My mother insisted that we should go in spite of the nervous rainy drops that were rushing washing the street. She was afraid that the water may find its way to our cellar and that we would have to work to dry it up. ..again. Because that was not the first time when she was afraid. Not the first time to have water in there. She still thinks that water will come in and she'll have to work it out.
Luckly, th sun came up after a while when the rain seemed not to stop for at least a few hours. But no! we have sun again and even so, I feel sleepy. I woke up at 7Am after going to bed at 1AM...uhhh, I thought I'm going to sleep until 8:30 or so to get to my 10AM appointment I had to the nutritionist this morning, but got up way too early.

Earlier I had a fight with my mum. Everything begun from the fact that I'm not capble to fix my room "as it should be", or at least as she thinks it should be fixed. I'm young. And still living with my parents. Not that young for that. And sometimes I feel I should do something about it, like take a poor job, move somewhere with my b/f and see what comes from this. I even think to start a vc job. Maybe something good (money) will come from this. But I have to do this on a regular basis and I feel I cannot do it like this. It seems too boring for me, to vanny, to clever to twist men's mind in order to get a pay per mint. Find it somehow outgrageous even they know what they are paying for. Anyway, this is the problem, I have to move on. Have to clean all the stuff in my life, have to move it on, throw all the unnecessary things to garbage, try not to bring new un-necessary ones, have to figure it out whether I want a baby now or I want to start working somewhere outside the contry. I don't know. That come thru my mind so many times and my b/f is so encouraging me to do it, that I almost feel I can actually do it. And why wouldn't I? I'm a can do person. I ought to be. ;-) After all, if you think you can do it, you can really do it. And my b/f wants to join me in this journey.

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