A note

Intro: I cannot remember when I wrote these lines, they were saved in a notepad, so I cannot see the date or time, but I believe it was somewhere in October-November 2011.

I'm sitting here in my old-fashioned chair, in this magnificent big room, with charming curves and tall walls. It's past midnight and I'm a little dizzy. I had a coffee at 4 pm, which is totally unusually for me; on top of that, I also had an energizing cocktail at 3 pm and some Goji fruits at 6 pm. What came out of this? Well...a so-called "not in the mood" stage which I have to confront with and make it disappear. After all, it will pass by its own when the moment is right. I already have that dizziness I told you about, but still have so many gains to write some thoughts here.

Well, recently I just figured out what I really want to do. Not that I didn't know already, but I was...afraid to accept it, that in this moment, I mess up things so bad I don't know how to pull this in a good light. I have missed the chance to be in the same group with the girl I was talking for bout two years now, a girl from another town who wishes so much to be a dentist, that she's not thinking 'what about that', how about this' and so on. SHE is JUST living the moment, and the moment is now, is hers. Why? How? Well, she looks right forward to her dream and stands up for it. I just had the "not so good for this thing" and look how I ended. Is this destiny?


And there was another notepad saying:

So that was the thing, I thought I was too little to make it. I arrived home, and I start writing about it. Where was this fear come from? It was something beyond my understanding or was it inside me? However, there was fear. And fear has nothing to do with success. Nothing.

What do I want?

I want to help people. To make them feel better about themselves. I want to help people find that inner self that lies inside every single person in this word. I want to teach young women not to let themselves beaten up. They should always fight for their rights. I want to 'open' the minds of the people lost into this every day frenzy. 

What do you do when somebody reaches the end point?

You go crazy. Speechless. Your world seems to have crushed into millions of pieces. STILL, there is something you should think of: future is not that dark as you plant it into your mind at the moment.

The person is gone, you're not!

Think a little bit, nobody knows what's on the other side. No one can say if it's bad or good, if there's a green open field filled with poppy red flowers. But what they say is that there is a definitely greatest silence you've ever concur before. There is peace of mind, peace of the non-existing body and the peace of being one with the God Itself. I believe there is a state that everybody here is willing to achieve, but none can't because we are so small thinking, so limited in our thoughts, so limited in our beliefs. I've heard that there's a lot of happiness out there, but not in the way we see it or understand it right now.

The person in question is released.

As never before. They cannot feel anything but happiness, a truly release and there's no fear, no wonder, nothing but peace.They can see you crying, struggle into this hopeless situation, and they will feel bad about you. I believe people that leave this world want us to be happy, not crying and mourning ...

Women's Day

Lovely day, I said to myself this morning at about 10AM. Then it really was, until I got to hear my mother saying out loud: we have water at the underground floor! WHAT???! What happened? Later I've heard that some piping in the other bathroom when flushing the toilet was the problem that caused the flood. Was then when I understand what happened: the toilet jar was moved a little and the pipes where removed from the wall. Or something like that ....and the water found its way to make a bit...bit flood. So big, that we had to work for about 2 hours and a half to make it clean. We have to clean almost all the house, except 2 bedrooms where the water was not so high...but 2 bedrooms (lucky, there were only some boxes with stuff, no furniture!) were severely damaged and the work to make it clean was terrible. I had muscle pains for about 2-3 days after...

Anyway, the weird thing is that we don't know exactly what made that toilet jar to move or who flushed the toilet so that the system then blocked and the water keep running out of the toilet tank causing the flood.

SELF.COM - is it only about self?

Some pasta idea I've found the other day at self.com, an lifestyle website with catchy eye! I love the SEX & LOVE section, full of cozy articles to laugh about, especially when you had the consciousness not to let yourself fooled by some society rule that indicates the dead-line for a marriage, the time-running for having a baby and so on...! Drop all this! Life cannot be "walled" into some magazine article, you have to follow your heart, do what your intuition tells you and never do stupid compromises that can put in danger your integrity!

Anyway, I've tried that recipe, but made it a little different: no meat, just tomatoes, union, garlic, a little water, some oregano and or course, pasta!!! ;-) It was delicious! I had a little bit rest from yesterday and ate it for lunch today.

Also browse Self Blogs, how having more firends could get you a better career! (oww!)

Also, I've entered my chance in some online coffee shop and I've realized I haven't tried my coffee at PAUL'S today, when it's Women's Day!

I've spent about $15 this month for the women's magazines...

As I reviewing the magazines I've brought the other day, I've realized that out there are women who are actually gift hunters, staying right there are waiting for a magazine to get out of the print and get on the news stand. Is this actually a sport or something? How many women do this on a regular basis? Do this women need the products offered as a gift along the magazines??

As I was wondering that, I could not notice the fact that I was one of them this March. I went to the news stand to actually shark the magazines with the gifts inside and measure their potencial: do I need that lip stick? Is that shampoo what I should use for my hair? How about that hand cream?!? I couldn't decide what I need the most, so I've took one AVON pink lips stick, one ALMOND Watson shampoo and...that's about it. I would have loved that lip gloss too, BUT I've decided to buy Cosmopolitan without it. What a pity! it was only half dollar more than the regular price. But I had no clue!

Anyway, this 'sport' can get us all if we don't pay attention. I've spent about $15 this month for the women's magazines...BUT I did so thinking that this is March, the women's month, and I'm gonna treat myself in every way. As a matter a fact, I'm going to pay a visit to Paul's, my fancy cafeteria I was telling you about and haven't finished the whole story...

I am LOVE (Building my future)

This is when my future starts. As I've told you, I thing I've manage to figure it out what is what I want: to have a flexible, home, online-like job and to work from where ever I want and whenever I want, to be able to choose my  working time, when to sleep, when to eat, when to work! And all this are soooo possible right now, right in this moment! It all starts in here, starts right now! I have to believe this and make it true as no body is going to believe it for me, and even so, I HAVE TO believe in it! So I've decided to do more work and actually do what I want: handmade earrings and accessories and then sell them to people that appreciates the art of uniqueness at a fair price for me and for them. And I've just realized WHY I haven't sold anything until now: is because I haven't trust myself for what I am, a pure, unique person with beautiful, magnificent talent of doing special things. I work with LOVE. I am love!

This is what I most want to know. WHAT IS MY DESTINY? Why I am on this Earth? Why I came here? What is my mission? I have to find the answer at that question and in order to do that I'll have to follow my intuition, let go with the wind, with the race...be here, right here and right now. I cannot be somewhere else, but NOW. let the show begin!

When the sun comes up

I like early mornings. Correction: I love them! It's that part of the day that has such an incredible energy and you feel you have a long way ahead. You can drink your coffee and set for the day, build up your schedule and see what's do be done for the day. Mornings have something special, like also have the late nights. But I realize this feeling has to do with the ones biorhythm - not all people are full of energy in the morning. I like to be up very early just because the sun invades my bedroom with its light, and I have a yellow-orange wall where the sun rays create magnificent spectacular appearance. I like early mornings with coffee and biscuits, in front of my computer setting the tasks for the day. I love summer early mornings and now that we are getting over winter, I have to say I'm anxious  for summer to come because being March already transformed the day from a short one to a pretty long-light one! :-)

I'm gonna bring my coffee and then I'll get back to some writing expecting to be finished!

And there it was

When you think we are looking and keep looking for answers all over the place, when they are deep inside us and deep...near us. At hand. We just need that state of mind to let them out. So earlier today I was listening quite buddha bar like music and there it hit me! Why don't I and can't I leave the country?! The answer was right in front of my eyes, my counscious was answering me all the questions in the world. It is because here I can still go out and  still can pay my bills and still can buy some fancy (not brand, though!) clothes. Because if I move I might have to work my ass very hard every single day to pay my rent, pay my bills, pay for food and all this. Here I have a part of them as I don;t have to pay rent and the living house facilities.

I'll be back later, it's a sunny day and I want to enjoy it with my lover.
Last night to went to see a play at the Nottara. it was fantastic. Later with details!

3 Things to do this month

This month is the start for the spring and there are some things that you absolutely should not miss this month! At least, I know I won't!

1). Flowers, flowers...
First of all, I want a month full with flowers of all kind. Flowers are very expensive on March 1st and March 8th, which are known to be the women's days and flower shops are into taking all the tribute for that, blowing the prices for every single flower. But after March 10th, things tend to set down and you can actually buy flowers at their real price.
2). Smile more often.
Yes, I like to believe I'm a smiley person, but am I...really? I mean, I like to think I'm an optimistic powerful woman, but when it comes to really do the things, it seems harder than expected. A smile shouldn't cost that much. Right?
3). Focus on things and actions that really really matters.
Like studying for my medicine admission and focusing more on chemistry. Reading more books and spending less time "flickring" the internet and Facebook or Yahoo! messenger.

All that said, I really think I should come back to this posting from time to time, like once a week, just to remember what I set my mind to!

Women INPOWER!

Yes! March has arrived in town! This month is my month and for that I've bought all the glossy magazines for women that I could buy! Especially those including gifts! Among those, I can mention Cosmopolitan, JOY, Beau Monde, and others, but I'm thinking to buy even WOMENS and other magazines with gifts, if those gifts in question satisfy my interests when talking to beauty products.

Anyway, I have to go now, get my boots out of the house, wear my natural smile and buy some great gifts! ;-) see you all later!